The Web Planet by Bill Strutton
13 February - 20 March 1965
Wahey. It’s impossible not to say a whole lot about this one, isn’t it? I’ve been entertained for a while by pictures and brief clips of the Menoptra dancing across the surface of Vortis, which along with the, shall we say, spirited reactions to this story in some sections of the fandom, had me very interested to see this one for myself. This legendarily weird story looms over the Sixties portion of Doctor Who, whether as a testament to the show’s ingenuity and willingness to try the unexpected, or as a testament to how its tendency to overreach past its means could result in some truly epic turkeys. I won’t screw around with pretending that I don’t lean more toward the former camp, but I can’t say with all seriousness, either, that this serial doesn’t hit those pitfalls more than once along the way. Often neglected is the fact that beneath the pageantry and the giant, beeping ants, there’s a very simple and straightforward plot of the TARDIS crew assisting an alien race in overcoming an oppressor which wouldn’t be out of place in many later seasons.
The real strength of The Web Planet is in its worldbuilding. Vortis maybe doesn’t quite squeak into “believable world” territory, but it more than makes the trip into “interesting world”. The light-worship of the Menoptra, their relationship with the Optera and Zarbi, and the presence and implications of the Animus are all pretty fascinating. The way it’s all executed is, needless to say, occasionally a little risible, especially the Zarbi, whose interminable beeping nearly ended this marathon prematurely. (Scary!) To say nothing of the obvious bit when one bumps the camera, of course. Still, everything is attempted with obvious attention and care, which softens the blow for some of the effects which just don’t work. The bizarre, musical performance of the Menoptra is striking, and best exemplified by the efforts of Roslyn De Winter of “Insect Movement” fame as Vrestin. Some of her buddies don’t quite have the knack of it, but it does all prompt the hilariously charming mental image of the bunch of them actually practicing the moth choreography that was apparently performed between takes. A detail which I’ve never heard remarked upon: the Menoptra’s actors take on stiff poses like dead bugs every time that they die. Nicely done.
As for the atmosphere of the production, the literal “atmosphere” applied to the lenses of the cameras during “outdoors” scenes is, um, not exactly successful, but props for trying. The Vortis sets themselves look very nice, occasionally visible studio lights notwithstanding. They’re very evocative of classic, fin de siecle sci-fi like A Trip to the Moon, which is curious to see in a television show from the 1960s for sure, but definitely appealed to me. And the unrelenting grimness on display in some parts of the story had me sitting up to take notice, too. The Zarbi tearing the wings off of captured Menoptra was absolutely horrifying in the best way, to say nothing of the scene where an Optera shoves her own head into the wall to stop a flow of acid from hurting her friends. All Ian can do is stand there in silent confusion as the other Optera move along, before getting on with it as he always does. That latter scene in particular was probably my favorite of the serial, this silent commentary on Ian’s part doing better to sell the theme of the episodes than anything else.
Of course, I have to admit that for all its efforts to sell the alien, The Web Planet sometimes goes a little too far in making it difficult to relate to the setting. The Menoptra are fun to watch, but it’s hard to feel sorry for them without some detachment, wing-ripping or no. I think that the Animus walks the line somewhat better, the more plain, human voice of the entity being a little easier to listen to than those of the insectoid characters, while still being cold, eerie, and alien. Alien, but not alienating. Fancy that. The Lovecraft angle has been done to death, and I don’t know a thing about it, so I’ll simply leave that particular aspect of the Animus’s construction at: neat.
So, yes, The Web Planet will never be one of my favorites, but I liked it a bit. Enough about the Seer, what about the Sera?
Sera’s Say:
Well, it was a difficult watch for both of us, as I hinted early on above. Sera’s a little more sensitive to loud noises than most people. As am I, frankly - try not to be too shocked that I rest somewhere on the autism spectrum, my enduring fixation on a British sci-fi series might have given it away. We had to take occasional breaks from the Zarbi’s noisy beeping and took it slow watching this one, which, hm, is how it was intended to be viewed actually. I suppose it all worked out in the end. Aside from annoyances, Sera also cracked up laughing for about a solid minute when the first Zarbi walked into frame, which is fair. They do have beautiful legs. She was entertained by some of its more experimental moments, though she is of the opinion more strongly than I am that its ambition outperformed its reach a bit. Still, at the end of it, she did remark that she wouldn’t mind if modern Who tried something this zany and ambitious. End verdict: “It was okay.”
Get your “Deus vult”s going early, because The Crusade is up next.
Memorable Dialogue:
“Maybe we could talk to them, make them understand?” “Apart from rubbing our back legs together like some sort of grasshopper? I doubt if we could get on speaking terms with them.”
“Light was our God and we existed in light, flying above thought.”
[The Carsinome gurgles.] “And the same to you!”
“What Vortis is, I am… What you are, I will become.”
Miserable Dialogue:
[BEEPING]
(Modified from the original posted at Gallifrey Base on 9 August 2018.)
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